A husband said to his wife, “You always carry my picture in your purse to the office. Why?" And she said, “Well, when there’s a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears." And the husband said, “Wow! You see, how great and powerful I am for you?" And the wife said, “Yeah, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can be greater than this one?"Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." She said "No, I can't marry anyone after you. He said, "But I want you to." She said, "But why?" He said: "Because Jones cheated me once in a horse deal!"
The Gold Ring many couples wear on their finger as a married people, presents a very special display. It signifies 5 major graces within your relationship:
1. Symbolizes the endlessness of your love.
2. It talks of your committment to each other, wherever you are. Regardless of temptation. It reminds you of your loyalty.
3. Gold symbolizes the purity of your heart toward one another.
4. Its a shadow of the Holy Spirit in our life, showing we are His.
5. Confirms an ancient tradition. That a vein in the 4th finger of the left hand went directly to the heart.
The Wedding Ring is an outward sign of a heart to heart and spiritual bond that unites a loving husband and wife. It's when two people feel an attraction and catch what real love is. It's giving expecting nothing in return. When two people are resolved they commit themselves to live their lives together, with the motive of giving and not taking. Serving and not being served. Blessing and not being blessed. That is what brings and keeps marriages together for a lifetime. Marriage is a serious and wonderful thing. Someone once commented, “Marriage is an adventure that begins at an altar, and one that ends at a gravesite.”
I. The Formation Of Marriage
God instituted marriage. And He designed it to be a blessing, to each other and their families. Someone said, "Marriage can be heaven on earth or it can be hell on earth." God put you and your wife or husband together. Doesn't matter what you're going through. God put you together. I know. 'He snores; or she doesn't know how to cook." Yet, God put you both together.
II. The Foes of Marriage
There's many foes, that do not want you together. Marriage is a symbol of what's in heaven. It gives the devil fits. It reminds him of the Body of Christ and the Bridegroom. That is why he's at work to destroy your marriage. Sometimes he'll wait, and do it one thing at a time. The media doesn't help. When you have shows like Mad Men, or Married with Children. Among some of the worst shows, we've ever seen. It takes its toll on couples who are simply falling out of love. Is that you? What about family interference? Family members always getting involved in your marriage relationship. They can't ever mind their own business! I say to them,(For you. Not unless you like it) Get a life! From the Mother-law, to other siblings. You wonder, How can they ever stay together?!
Iii. The Failure of Marriage
Its been surveyed that statistics of divorce are the same or higher in the church, than the world. Divorce should not be mentioned. It should be a bad word in your relationship. God put you together. You made a vow to Him. Do you remember this?
Promising to keep cherish and defend
And to be her or his faithful and true spouse
I _________ to you to be my wedded spouse,
To have and to hold from
Many times a beautiful couple turns because of selfishness on both parts. They both want to have it both ways. It's always important to know, that any successful marriage has Christ at the center of it. Being married to my wife of 15 years was no easy task. She, early in our marriage had to adjust to alot of things. She lived with friends for about 5-6 years and was involved in ministry. Me? It was full time ministry. I was in a Victory Outreach Christian Recovery Home for 3 years. I had known Vera in the church prior. When we tied the knot. It was great. Then later on, some little schisms began. From washing to cleaning, or me saying the wrong thing. Or her not thinking what I thought she already knew had to be done, and so forth. For the first two years, talk about anger, mayhem, rage, and tears. Wow, it was tough. Until, we found the secret. And that was, 'I can't have it my way. I am not right, and neither are you. God is the only one right. And we need to change according to His word.' Then it got better and better. I remember one time, we're on our way back to our apartment, back from another busy day of ministry. I clicked the opener and nothing. We go to the store thinking its the batteries. We try again, and nothing. I open the garage door by lifting it, and put my son through. He goes around, opens the front door. No lights, nothing works. I'm not in the mood, and I'm thinking, "Oh, my God? I think I know what it is. And yep, it's exactly that. She didn't pay the electric bill." I'm feeling, 'Hey, I work hard. I deal with alot of multiple situations, issues, projects, and multiple personalities. Do I need to put up with this? I'm tired right now, its 10:30 PM(Oh, don't tell me? You've never felt like this. I'm sorry, maybe its just me. I just wanted to be personal here) Ministry has its curves and turns. Normal people come home from work, eat dinner, look outside the window, put on the porch light, yawn, sit down, watch a movie or a game and maybe go to Bible study once a week. Us in full time ministry. Let me just say this, It's never a dull moment(I'm not saying we're better. Its just that in ministry you live being on your toes. Pretty intense stuff). Let's get back. Well, at this time, It's on, and I mean its on. Its WWIII! And it gets ugly. It's, I think the worst argument, we've ever had in our 15 years of marriage. It's like the devil came and slept in our sofa in that little 2 story apartment. We fought till maybe 5:00 a.m. My son. My poor son, at that moment was frantic. He was paranoid and didn't know what to do. He was yelling, crying, pleading with us to stop. But we dealt with it that night. We talked, forgave each other, made up, cried, and prayed. Some other fools, (Selfish at that. Yes, its true, Fools.) would've of taken off, and never returned. Never thinking that there's hope. That their kids wanted them to be happy and stay together. Thats all they wanted, a united family. That's all. Some guys act foolish. How? They retreat, and separate themselves from their spouses. Develop different bank accounts, go to different churches, make excuses for not to come home. Then, they attempt to justify it. Not knowing that everything that happens in that household is a result of their leadership!
Prov. 18:22, "The man who finds a wife finds a treasure and recieves favor from the LORD. The man who finds a wife finds a good thing; she is a blessing to him from the LORD."
IV. The Fruit of Marriage
What a blessing when all the pistons are firing. When things are good. When your home atmosphere is what God designed it to be. I knew I was doing my job, when my wife would sing as she cooked and tended to needs. I tell couples, to hang in there. That it'll get better. You never know what you have until you lose it. That when you find love, hang onto it. For it is hard to find love. And when you do find love, its great, its good, its blessed, it beautiful. Tough sometimes, but for the most part tremendous. To love and feel wanted. To give and see that you have a part in the life of the one you love. There will be fruit. Maybe you don't see it. But there's a blessing right around the corner.
According to Ephesians 5 The husband and wife have different roles. He's to be:
- Manager, the
- Model and the
- Minister. (I didn't say Monster)
1 Pet 3:7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers."
Warren Wiersbe said: "The husband must be the 'thermostat' in the home, setting the emotional and spiritual temperature. The wife often is the 'thermometer,' letting him know what that temperature is!"
So she also is to be his . . .
- Helpmate - (I didn't say Hell mate!)
- Soulmate - The best of friends
- Team mate - Back to back partner. and
- Playmate(Oh my', should I say this? What? Do you expect me to explain? You is crazyyy. You've got indigestion. But, Ok I'll make it biblical . . Heb. 13:4)
V. Fight for your Marriage
You live and learn. You know the story I told earlier? When the lights were off, she began putting candles on in the dark. Do you know what she told me after the big fight, in tears? She said since the lights were off, she wanted to make the best of it and have a romantic night. I felt, "What a big Buffoon I am!" What I'm saying is, we must find the best solution and work it out, and not getting into it, like we did. Fight for your marriage. Listen to each other. Catch the meaning of what they're really saying. Not how they're saying it. Work on your marriage. If you stay the same, you'll grow apart. If love and commitment is there you’ll be blessed. If you follow God’s word, and pray, you'll make it. What it takes for a happy marriage? It takes commitment. It takes companionship. It takes communication. It takes spiritual character. It takes the ATM cash factor. What you put in is what you get out of it. Sad is the day, when you both go to withdraw, and read: Insufficient funds. That's right, marriage is what you make it. So what that Ring? You wear it, but is it important to you? Or just some little bling you love to look at, with your rose colored glasses?
If you'd like to leave a comment. feel free. I'll attempt to respond.
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